Wednesday, September 30, 2009




Welcome to a new feature on Ask Grandma J!   By new feature, she's talking about a recent attempt at domestic violence  training here at the weed infested ghost town  known as the Spa.




Grandma J was looking at her old Cutco cooking utensils, and realized she's schlepped these sturdy reliable tools across rivers, valleys and state lines.    She bought these tools as a young bride from a door to door salesman, who was her husband as she sat drinking Folger's instant coffee with her neighbor Wilma.   The year was 1965.



Grandma J has had  several hundred sets of spatulas, ricers and masher stuff over the years,  hey where's the masher? like the plastic stuff in that container.  Nothing has lasted and served her as well as the Cutco utensils. 



Lately, Phillip Johnny Bob has been hanging around and showing some interest when Grandma J nukes popcorn cooks, so she thought she'd broaden his horizons in the kitchen.



Grandma J handed PJB her old cookbook, that served as her bible for many years.




Phil started thumbing through it.......



But found it disgusting  hard to figure out with all the references to measurments and foreign phrases like filet and ala carte.




So, Grandma J thought she'd try the hooked on phonics for cooking method of teaching PJB.  Or, simply put....hands on!



Oh, for crab's sake!   Crusty has his eye on Grandma J's spoon rest!  Could it be possible that Crusty thinks it's an aquamarine friend from the Chesapeake Bay?  





Phillip Johnny Bob decides to take matters into his own hands and put Crusty in his place.    Thank goodness Grandma J was there to save Crusty....and try to salvage the family unit and go back to square one with the cooking lessons....by eliminating the seafood section of the old cookbook.



17 comments:

Daryl said...

Oh PJB and I are equals in the kitchen. I have that very same cookbook and mine is just as nasty, I do believe its a sign of much use and much messy cooking ... not that mine has been used in the recent years

Anonymous said...

You forgot to take your meds again, didn't you?

Is that a chip clip on the back of Phil's apron?

Colin

Jen said...

I have that same cook book too!
The strawberry pie recipe page tastes real good!
Watch out Bobby Flay--there's a new bear in town. ha!

Living on the Spit said...

Maybe PJB was in the mood for a little He Crab Soup?

I love you, Grandma J!!! Love the bowl on top of PJB.

Linda said...

I have cookbooks too, but I don't know why! They are in the cupboard taking up space. I have one just like yours...and I got married in 1965. He wasn't a traveling salesman, just a wonderful, funny man. He still is!

The Incredible Woody said...

Such a fun day!! And yes, I am on the mend!!

Anonymous said...

...now that's funny!!
Happy Wedneaday, lMnop

Busy Bee Suz said...

This is too funny. I hope Crusty was not too alarmed and will soon forget this incident!!!
I love utensils that last forever. I mean last a lifetime!!!

Life with Kaishon said...

Oh my gosh! You are so clever and funny! I LOVE this post. It reminded me of when I sold cutco knives.... that wasn't the best career choice for me : ) but it is a good memory!

I love your old cookbook! Your family unit has so much fun together. I really want to move in. Immediately!

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

OK. Grandma J., this is one of your best, and you have many. This is in the BOSSY category of funny (for me anyway) because at the TITLE alone I was already laughing.

Plus, I know the work that goes into simply photographing Peanut Butter and Jelly--I mean PBJ. Although he's an amiable fellow, he can sometimes be difficult on the set, as was evidenced by his inability to get along with his castmate, Crusty.

If I were rating this movie, I'd give it two crab claws up.

Pat Jenkins said...

this is awesome grandma j!! without being too presumptious hough can i lend j bear a few tips... first stay away from the open flame, it looks like he is a little to close to the burner for my liking.. and second ditch the hat. it looks like a construction workers helmet instead of a chef's hat... but then again he may need the hard hat, him being a new cook and all things may get a little messy!!... great post!!!!

Noe Noe Girl...A Queen of all Trades. said...

GJ this was wonderful! Just love it! I thought of Crusty right off when I saw that spoon rest! Too funny. I tell you....you need to be writing for Saturday Night Live!
Love you and miss you too!
<><

Caution Flag said...

I've had the same cookbook for many years, but mine is really, really, really clean. Not sure what that means...

New topic: Any chance you're going to review the movie, "The Invention of Lying" for us??

Mental P Mama said...

This is one of your best. Ever. I hope you just ordered in....

Big Hair Envy said...

NOW I understand why you sent him to the State Fair of VA!! (BTW - I took a great picture of him...it's on my blog today:) )

hollywood said...

I love the mental pic of the photo op starting...but is PJB okay on the stove? Watch the burners! lol.

foolery said...

So how did the crab cakes and bear claws turn out? ; )