Saturday, July 19, 2008

Once Upon a Time....

....long before there was a Grandma J, there was a Grandma Rita. Besides Rita, some called her Mom, some called her
Grandma, others called her Reet, and the people at the Social Security office called her Mary.

A bit of history and background…Rita was a stay at home mom, who played gin rummy all day and almost raised all five of her children before she was widowed in the 70’s. Not one to let the world pass her by, she went to real estate school. And let’s say it’s a given that Rita became an accomplished and successful Realtor.


Now with that being said, Rita had a few incidents in her day that caused a barrage of rumors some personal embarrassment, but in retrospect, were funny...and will eventually become family folklore. Great grandkids will be convinced our family is right up at the top of the Urban Legends list, willing to make up scenarios where older relatives have unfortunate accidents for the sake of a good laugh....or, for lack of a better word, liars.

This incident is one I posted to
another blogger’s comment section in response to some rather hilarious emails her mother sent her, back when she was allowed to have email. Still waiting to hear that explanation.

My mother had one of those oscillating sprinklers that go back and forth.






One summer morning she ran outside to the backyard "for a split second" to move it to the other side of the backyard. She had to run so she wouldn't get wet...and she was naked.



Well as she tried to hurry back to the sliding patio door, she slipped on the wet cement and pulled a muscle in her back.....there shy lay as the sprinkler kept swaying back and forth, getting her soaked. In the meantime, the man next door, a teacher home for the summer, playing Mr. Mom, shouted out his upstairs window....

"Rita, you can't sunbathe like that, my kids can see you from up here"....

*Disclosure: No animals or grandmothers were permanently hurt or injured in anyway. Just slightly embarrassed, but more than willing to tell everyone they knew, including the folks at the local car wash what happened.


14 comments:

Keeper Of All Things said...

OMG....LMAO!!!!

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

Every single time in the past 24 hours I have thought about this incident I howl with laughter. And now my son does too. OH! I forgot, I told the story last night over dinner with my parents. They choked they were laughing so hard.

My mother had the internet and no longer does because...NOBODY KNOWS. It is a mystery of the universe that can never be solved.

Too, too funny. Can't wait to hear what happens at the pool today.

Katrine said...

That is so funny!

Pleasing Procrasinator said...

That is too funny Gramma J. I thought for sure you were going to say she was locked out. How long did she have to lay there? LOL.

Pumpkin Delight (Kimberly) said...

Yah, did the summer vacation dad save her?

Hahahaha!

Unknown said...

Pumpkin, that's exactly who helped her up!

M said...

OMG perhaps it is the name...but once year I was very sick with sinus troubles- I awoke hacking...so I slept on the couch... I was hacking so much that I thought a walk outside would cool me down and help me stop the non-stop cough. I stepped out back on our patio... AND....the door closed behind me- locked and I was neked! There was no way back in except to walk to the front door and knock or go to the back bedroom door and knock...so I chose the path with least getting sighted and used the back. I had to knock several times before waking up my husband who was totally purplexed at why I was outside at 3 a.m. neked!! The End!

heartshapedhedges said...

That must be a family tradition, because my mother (Rita's daughter) used to have that same sprinkler in our yard, and we kids would run and play in it naked. What fun!

tj said...

...lol...I loved this story over at CBW's place and I love it again here! THAT is priceless! lol... I told my Aunt that story this morning, of course, after a lengthy discussion about what a "blog" is... ;o) Her response was, "oh my, I would just die!"...

...Blessings GJ... :o)

beachbum said...

ok this could end up a blog all on its own. Rita storys. Like the bus accident, or the sink and the water (forgetting to turn off 4 x at least) Flushing teeth, dying carpet oh you know it only goes on and on just have to know Rita could be a reality show like no other. signed Rita's favorite daughter. I would say child but we know Jimmy was #one.

Lucy said...

Thanks for stopping by GJ. I really am NOT a writer BUT a READER. SOOOOO that's why no post on my blog. I will stay in touch. Loved RITA.

jlo said...

Running through the sprinklers is a silent killer...that's how Bella broke her arm!! ;)

foolery said...

Ho
Lee
COW

Grandma J! This is so funny, and your graphics are PERFECT. I just had to walk back to the production room to share the Rita stories with my coworker. We both laughed along time.

Any more on the horizon?

See you next Monday (vacation)!

-- Laurie @ Foolery

Unknown said...

I just can not believe that story! CRAZY! How did I never read it before.
I love your blog. I love your stories. I love you.