Windows of Opportunities

Summer is alive and well in Central Texas.  What that means in layman's terms, I love when people say that....layman's terms.  Kind of makes them sound like an expert on whatever subject they are talking about. You know, bringing it down to a level that ordinary people can relate to.

So, when Grandma J refers to Central Texas, and she does in almost every post,  she means smack dab in the middle of the State.

This morning, when Grandma J started out on her Saturday rounds, it was a tad cooler than it usually is at that hour. 

She took advantage of this fifteen minutes of opportunity, before the heat makes it impossible, to open her sun roof....which is currently referred to as a moon roof.   When did they change the name?

xoxo  Grandma J

Over The Edge?

...Off Her Rocker?

 JJ here.....that's right, Grandma J has been in a funky mood, so let me give you a brief update. 

Her family flew the coop today....

left the great state of Texas.  

 Looks like I've become her source of, ummm quirkyness.

 Wouldn't you say?

Some Things Are Different in Texas


The city Grandma J lives in only sells beer and wine in markets and Walmart.  If you decide to have margarita's on Taco Tuesday, you have to go to a liquor store in the neighboring town.   This liquor store isn't open on Sundays.

Of course that shouldn't put a damper on Taco Tuesday....but you couldn't have jello shots during your Sunday afternoons of football, baseball, or table tennis games.


Grandma J doesn't drink, but might have a good margarita on special occasions if she's at El Torito, Avila's or Don Jose's.  And, those places are in CA, so the crazy liquor laws in Texas don't apply to her once a year binge.


The reason all of this information about where and when you can buy alcohol in Texas is confusing to Grandma J is because you can do this.......

 Drive through drinks BABY!

 That's right this place is one of many drive through nightclubs called Daquiri Express.

Grandma J could explain all the ins and outs of how this works, but it would drive her to drink....and then she'd be drinking and driving.   So, she found this cute little video where these novice and cute filmmakers critique a Daquiri Express in Louisianna!   

Is this a nationwide chain?  Maybe a franchise?   Grandma J's curious as to why the State of Texas allows these when they are so fussy about where and when you can buy a bottle to take home and make your own daquiris or margaritas.   And.....that cute filmmaker bought a shot of hard liquor TO GO!

The question is...and yes, there is a question, do you have drive-thru cocktail bars?  

(Almost) SILENT SUNDAY

Texas is under a severe drought.....and no one is allowed to water their lawns. People are encouraged to narc on their neighbors.



Despite the drought, Grandma J found this blossom outside her back door this Sunday morning.






It's attached to this weed.....





In the back courtyard that's supposed to have a lush green lawn. So someone who might have some extra rain clouds, please send them to Texas before Grandma J's grandsons arrive from Colorado! Being cooped up with two active boys + A-Ron for a week could have serious consequences.

On a lighter note.....Phillip Johnny Bob talked Grandma J into buy him some new clothes....something from Dollar Tree fashionable.




Some surfer threads. He wanted me to make sure and show his good friend, Little T that he doesn't always wear dorky clothes with his shirt tucked in.

HOT In The Hood

Today was a busy day around here. Busy means getting up, have some coffee, checking emails and a couple of blogs, get some more coffee make my bed, check some more blogs. Water the weeds seeded dirt out back, then polish off the rest of the coffee while I read some more blogs.

After showing and getting dressed, I drive up to the leasing office for the coffee, pastry and fruit that they have every morning.

By noon, I'm well on my way, running errands, getting my car washed then visiting JJ. When my busy afternoon starts winding down, I look at the outside temp in my car....




Over 100 degrees! I'm just getting used to the fact that the high temperature of the day is yet to be......


See what I mean? There isn't much cooling off until after nine at night. Right now it's 11:30 p.m., and 91 degrees.

Not to change the subject, but I received this picture from Phillip Johnny Bob and his East Coast Mother.....

nothing like rubbing it in! Dude! Don't forget your sunscreen!

All you peeps who are ultra green around the gills....look away. That's right, don't read what I'm gonna say....cover your eyes and no peeking.

For those still reading....I keep my thermostat at 72. I can't help it, I love cool. The good thing is? I have never turned the heat on in the two years I've been in Texas. Where do you keep your thermostat?

Meet My Neighbors

Howdy, y'all!
I crack myself up when I try to act all Texan.

Grandma J has lived in Texas a little over two years, and figured she'd get to know some of the locals. No, not the ones in the Compound..... the real locals.




And just so you know, Grandma J is not one to ride any horse, let along a bucking bronco, but she did own a Ford Bronco once.

Now that I have your attention, let me tell you about the local neighbors that I pass by almost every single day. I don't know what to make of them living on a small piece of property, surrounded by a housing development, but hey....if it's fine with them, it's ok by me.




These are Texas longhorns. There are six of them that I know of on this property. You can see homes in the background.




This longhorn is my favorite....and yes, they do stare at you. I didn't get too close, because I wasn't sure if they would wander over like the bulls JJ and I stopped to see a while back. I don't know how these guys would react to JJ...because JJ isn't exactly quiet when he sees potential playmates.

Grandma J's new digs, which we will refer to as The Spa, is a short hike from thise guys. One day she hopes to get up the nerve to ask the owners if she can pet them.

Waco Late At Night.......
......the witching hour

Sometimes A-Ron's baseball tournaments start early...and here in Central Texas, early means Friday night. So the team, along with Grandma J, and the rest of the extended team heads fifty miles up the road to Waco Texas for their first two games....back to back, starting after 7 p.m. It's important to squeeze as much baseball into each day, because 7th grade boys, who start school before eight in the morning have no business slacking off before midnight.

Once again, Grandma J is amazed at the beautiful diamonds that the boys are privileged to play on. There are at least eight of them in this complex.

Scores? First game, our Texas Tribe wins 14-1. Second game, Tribe loses 10-6. No doubt the Tribe will come back strong, just like last week in Round Rock, where they took second place.

By the time the coach had his pow-wow, and everyone loaded up their vehicles, it was time for some of us to get some grub. Right about now Grandma J would like to send out a prayer petition for a more diverse menu Sunday...McNuggets doesn't agree with everyone after midnight.

McD's it was....a very busy location right off the infamous I-35. But Grandma J was encouraged by this sign......

Inside, not so much....there was one line....a very long line. This poor child was having a rough time.

Her manager was definitely a team leader wannabe. There were orders no one was claiming.

The manager kept double checking the screen trying to make sure they had the orders right. Hello.....Grandma J shouted under her breath maybe they got tired of waiting and left.

This guy? was getting very impatient waiting and started to fidget and rumble a bit.

Michelle #2 befriended him by asking him if he wanted to follow her on Facebook. Michelle #2 is such a people person.




We finally got our food...just coffee for Grandma J, and decided to sit outside. Three ball players, two moms, one sorry he came dad. How do you spell fun?

Grandma J got home at two in the morning, read one blog then hit the hay.

It's a rainy Saturday in Texas, but we are up for more games tomorrow, back in Waco. Maybe we can eat at Rudy's BBQ.

FRIDAY MATINEE.....
...on any freaking day there is always a matinee worth talking about.

Grandma J had a blast on Easter Sunday. There was mass in the morning where arriving forty minutes early didn't guarantee a parking space in the church parking lot. That's because all the good friends of the Easter Bunny got there two hours earlier. These are the same friends of Santa Claus that show up on Christmas. You know where this left Grandma J. That's right, parked far away on a soft shoulder, and walking in the rain, crossing one of those dangerous FM routes to get to the church.

All was good...we ate a nice big breakfast at Cracker Barrel, then we went to the movies. The first movie of the day is cheaper, and Grandma J loves a bargain, but you knew that. Here in Central Texas, the seats in our new Cinemark 16 are only $5.50.


We went to see Observe And Report starring Seth Rogen. Yes it's rated R, and yes A-Ron and newly Permitted to Drive Granddaughter went.



We like to sit up against the handicap rail so we can kick the disabled put our feet up. That's right, Classy is our middle name.



And as you can see Grandma J had no problem asking a complete stranger to take our picture. She was slightly disappointed that he wouldn't let me use his popcorn and large Icee as props.

Oh yeah, the movie........



If you saw Mall Cop, you probably wished Paul Blart would get some balls and quit being such a wuss. Well, in Observe and Report, Ronnie Barnhardt is a vulgar, fowl mouthed, gun happy thug who is head of mall security. He is basically deranged and psycho.



He lives with his alcoholic, sleazy mother who, when asked by Ronnie if he was the reason his father left them, says "Yes".


Ronnie falls for a pretty blonde makeup girl from a kiosk in the mall similar to Paul Blart falling for the pretty girl in the wig kiosk in Mall Cop. The difference is, the makeup girl, Brandi, played by Anna Faris, can't stand Ronnie, but when she drinks she gets vulgar and raunchy.


The mall falls victim to a streaker, flasher, and this gives Ronnie the opportunity to prove that he is smarter than the detective assigned to the case. Some of his tactics are delusional and scary. I have to say, there is plenty of humor too. But there is also plenty of nudity.............


And when the streaker, who is older and fat, runs through the mall for what seemed like forever.....with us getting a full frontal view of his little noodle competing with his belly in the jiggling department...some of us laughed and someone covered their face.

Oh yeah, Ronnie shoots the streaker....and dispite all the blood and guts he is still alive, though barely.




I give this movie two out of five Easter eggs . Yeah, I thought it was that bad.

The Postman Cometh

Yesterday I received a much anticipated package. The sender said it should be here by Friday, but I knew better. This Compound I live in is deep in the heart of Texas....land of wide open spaces and slow mail service. What that means is I wasn't disappointed at all when it didn't arrive on Friday. I was hopeful for Saturday, but thought Monday was the more likely day of arrival.

I was delighted to see it when it arrived on Saturday!!

There was an inner envelope...which heightened my enthusiasm.....Flat Caroline was finally here!

YES! Isn't she cute? But there was another surprise. Something homemade, and personalized for Phillip Johnny Bob!

Marey at hijk made him an Easter scarf with his initials embroidered on it...and a border of ribbon that said Easter Blessings! So friggin perfect for Phil to wear this Easter.

Then PJB read the instructions for Flat Caroline. We have to take her to meet JJ and maybe go somewhere very Texas, then send a postcard to Caroline's school and a picture of her here doing something Texas-ish.

Monday, Flat Caroline will be headed to the warm Gulf of Mexico for a visit with Suz. If Suz still can't get her garage open then Flat Caroline can ride around town with Cocoa and Ozzie on the Dyson.